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Are we destined for a hard life?

True Living, True Purpose

Are we destined for a hard life?-2

As I was growing up, lots of people told me that when you find your passion, your purpose, your place in this world, it all becomes effortless.

I loved this thought. It made sense and was highly appealing yet felt so frustratingly out of my reach. It felt like a secret society that only a chosen few would get to be part of. I feared these people were the lucky ones, whereas for me life would always be hard work.

Hard work had been instilled in me from such a young age by my most wonderfully achievement oriented parents. So why would I think I would be one of these lucky ones?

Deep down I’m an idealist. A fact that I believe has served me well over the years. It means I dream, I believe and I never give up.

The idealistic part of me never gave up on the goal of effortlessness, this was what I was aiming for and I wouldn’t give up until I found it.

It was this that kept me going when things felt so hard. When I felt like a round peg in a square hole. When I felt so very confused and exhausted.

It was this that drove me to go deeper and deeper within myself to find out who I really was. I peeled myself back layer after layer and closely examined it trying to work out if that piece was the real me, something I thought I had to be or what someone else had told me.

So many layers fall upon us from our family, education, culture, media, relationships, spiritual beliefs and more.

These layers impact us yet they don’t define the real person underneath. We go deeper than that. We are the core upon which all of these layers have built up. Yet, the core will always be there. The opportunity always exists to uncover it.

My trigger for digging through the deepest of layers was collapsing with chronic fatigue. A gift wrapped in a very scary wrapping paper which I had no desire at all to open. Yet hidden inside lay the opportunity of time, space, reflection, truth, tears and ultimately the real me. It is one of the best gifts of my life (alongside my husband and son) and a huge teacher and guide.

So when I started to find the most real me, I started to do the things that I wanted to do. That gave me energy. That brought me to life every day. I found there was no longer a separation between work and life and the real me meandered effortlessly between the two. I found that when I stopped ‘trying’, the magic happened, I felt filled with immense energy and joy and it was truly effortless.

I no longer believe that our work in the world needs to be hard. In fact I believe the opposite. No longer as an idealist but as a realist. When we commit ourselves to finding our true self inside and using that to guide us, the rest is effortless.

This is not to be confused with the fact that life is unpredictable, there are challenges which come our way and they can absolutely be hard, but when we keep true to ourselves we can navigate them and can learn so much more about ourselves. For me, this is the biggest and most rewarding journey of our life.